


The Almost- Akumas

by Juneprinx



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Depression warning, Implication ofsuicide, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Suicide, My first fic for the ml fandom and it's a WILD bummer, Short One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-01
Updated: 2018-01-01
Packaged: 2019-02-26 02:24:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 952
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13226187
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Juneprinx/pseuds/Juneprinx
Summary: Negative emotions that run high aren't always the next Akuma victim.  Of course Papillon finds them, that's how he goes about his dastardly deeds. However, those that he sent his akuma to find aren't always turned into villains.





	The Almost- Akumas

**Author's Note:**

> This is a very very short fic featuring clinical depression and implied self-harm/implied suicide intent. I wouldn't suggest it for anyone that has difficulty with such topics. I promise there is a happy end.

Papillon felt strong emotions throughout the city all the time. Some more powerful than others. However, there were times when he’d send his akumas out not to cause harm or draw Ladybug and Chat Noir out, but when he knew there was something he could do.

 

The first time something like this had happened, it had taken him by surprise. He had felt the strongest negative emotions reverberating throughout the city and immediately sent an akuma that way. As the akuma settled into it’s host’s token object and he was able to share thoughts with the victim, the emotion he felt came at him at full force. It stunned him for a moment, the racing negative thoughts churning like an active volcano, the boiling hurt bubbling fiercely in the victim’s chest. The pure, unadulterated depression that had settled into his victim’s mind was so overwhelming that he began to tear up. He composed himself however, when he felt his victim still to hear what he had to say.

Papillon knew what he did on an almost daily basis was viciously evil but…he never really did mean any kind of harm. He didn’t care for people to be hurt, he just wanted to obtain the miraculous’ of Paris’ favorite heroes. He needed them in order to fulfill the wish that had his heart aching almost as much as his current akuma victim. But he knew that what he felt in desire for that wish was nothing compared to the complete agony his current victim felt.

“What is your name?” He asked hesitantly. His victim took a shaky breath and let it out slowly.

“Damien Colbert,” His victim responded in a voice only barely above a whisper. “Are…..are you…are you Papillon? Are you going to turn me into an akuma? I don’t…want to hurt anyone I just….I just don’t want to exist anymore….” Gabriel swallowed hard.

“Damien,” Papillon began uncertainly. “Ceasing to exist won’t do anyone any good. Trust me. The person I held most dear to my heart left me and I do what I do every day to try to get her back. Trust me when I say that ceasing to exist does not benefit anyone.”

“B-But,” Damien choked. “All I-I do is m-m-mess things up, I can’t do anything right, I’m not going to be able to do anything and I’m just a burden! I’m just a burden to everyone around me! I c-can’t be there for the people that care about me even though I want to be, I can barely get up and do things like a normal person, I-”

“That’s enough,” Papillon cut off. “Just because you are having a difficult time now does no t mean you are a burden, nor does it mean that you will have these same difficulties all your life.”

“But I’m a screw-up!” Damien screamed. “I can’t finish my schoolwork, I can’t focus, I can’t think! I can’t think I can’t think! I can’t pay attention to what people are saying to me and I feel awful because I can’t answer them and I can’t do anything right because I don’t hear what anyone says and-”

“Damien, I need you to take a deep breath and let it out slowly. I’m going to count to ten and you will spend that time exhaling. Is that understood?” Papillon ordered.

“.…Yes.”

“Good. Inhale…….now exhale. Ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two, one.”

“.………Th-thank you…”

“Damien I need you to understand something. Don’t think about what you’ve messed up thus far. It is in the past. Rather than dwelling on the past, you must be proactive and look to the future. Understand what you may have done wrong so that you may better yourself. I understand that this takes a large amount of effort, but it is a step forward rather than staying in this quicksand. Do you understand?”

“Y….Yes….”

“Good. May I ask how old you are?”

“.…I’m 17…”

“Do you live with your family, or on your own?”

“I live with my mother….”

“I need you to get up when you are able and go to your mother. Explain to her how you feel and what’s bothering you. Request that you see a professional that can prescribe antidepressants. I promise you, Damien, this is a turning point.”

Damien and Papillon were both quiet for a few moments, allowing themselves to both come down from the emotional high they’d both been riding. Damien took a few deep breaths to slow down his heart rate before speaking again.

“Papillon…?” Gabriel snapped out of his own train of thought. His mind was racing with the knowledge of what he had just done, what he had just prevented.

“Damien.”

“Thank you. Are you going to akumatize me now?”

“...No, Damien. No, you shall not be akumatized today. Today, you will be helped.”

“I…Thank you, Papillon. Thank you so much…” Gabriel didn’t know what to say. After a beat, he took a shaky breath.

“It’s time to make that turn, Damien.” And with that, he recalled his akuma. The akuma retreated and began it’s flight back to Papillon’s observatory.

 

 

* * *

 

 

“Sir.”

“Yes, Nathalie?”

“How shall I file the withdrawal of 5,000 euros to the….Colbert family? I’ve not heard of the Colbert family.”

“Write it off as an anonymous donation, Nathalie. No one shall know of this, is that understood?” Nathalie stared at her boss with slightly widened eyes for a brief moment before adjusting her glasses and mentally shaking herself back to attention.

“Yes sir.”

 

* * *

 

 

From that day on, it had been commonplace for Papillon to send his akumas out to those that might just  need it.


End file.
